Before I Go
by Sminkies
Summary: Chapter 2 up! “If my staying shows you that, then I’ll gladly correct that assumption.”
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: FF7 does not belong to me. But I wish it did.

Author's Notes: Ummmm…something I thought of before I went to sleep. I might edit it later on though. Just a sample. Something quick I suppose. Excuse me for the lack of plot and jumbled thoughts. And vague details. _SORRY!_

Read, enjoy and review!

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_Breathe Tifa. Breathe. Just one question that's all you need. _

_ONE QUESTION; ONE ANSWER._

"You can do it Tifa. It's a simple question. Just go to him and just ask, damn it," a certain ruby-eyed 23 year-old bartender encouraged herself in front of a faded mirror as she took a deep breath and made her way out of the room.

As she opened the door and stepped out a figure with unruly blonde hair that seemed to defy gravity stood firmly in front of her, a single hand in the air as if ready to knock just a few seconds before the wooden door had moved.

An awkward moment of silence hung in the air as the two adults refrained from meeting each other's gaze.

"Um…"

"Actually.."

They both started simultaneously.

"Go ahead."

"No it's ok." A smile. "Go ahead Cloud, you first."

"Well I just wanted to tell you to not wait up tonight and eat dinner without me," came Cloud's restrained reply followed up by a scratch to the back of his head; an obvious mark of nervousness Tifa was all too familiar with seeing.

_Like we ever eat dinner with you anyways. _

"Oh. Why? Is it work?" Pause. "You know the kids will be disappointed. Denzel's been waiting for you all week. Won't you just skip tonight? Please? For the kid's sake at least."

Cloud could only shake his head in disapproval.

"This is one delivery I can't miss. Sorry." An apology seemed fit for a perfect liar.

_Liar._

"That's ok. I'll just tell them tomorrow night then." Another smile; a fake one this time; one made for a perfect façade.

It was like this every night. Another lie from Cloud, another excuse from Tifa, and another disappointed dinner for the children. A scene played out with skilled perfection. Every detail apt to the previous night, maybe except for the dinner made and the amount of tears cried. But not tonight. It was going to stop here…

_Exactly what the hell is more important than his family?_

_Family? I forgot, we're not really a family. Never mind._

"Now let's see what exactly is so damn **important** that you have to miss dinner, Cloud Strife," whispered Tifa Lockheart as she followed the lone hero as he turned into a dark alley and disappeared.

Tifa could only wonder why Cloud didn't have a single package on his Fenrir and yet was so intent on making this _special delivery_.

_Oh. So this is the damn _**special delivery**

The brunette's wine-colored eyes turned a deep shade of scarlet as the infamous church came into view. Her mouth took a dangerous frown from her usual smiling lips and deeply recognizable creases appeared between her eyebrows as she scorned Cloud silently from the church entrance.

"I'm sorry Aeris. I was caught up in a few things, couldn't get away from it. But I'm here now…"

_We're an _**it**_ now? God you're unbelievable!_

Unbeknownst to the mako-infused warrior, an old childhood friend stood watching over him before turning away and leaving after hearing him say those dreadful 3-letter words.

"I love you." _How do I tell these words to her Aeris? To Tifa?_

A solitary rose lay in the center of the church and the roaring exhaust of a racing Fenrir echoed throughout the church…

0---------------------------------------------------00---------------------------------------------------0

Heavy footsteps of the blonde-haired warrior echoed throughout the empty bar. The stomps of his boots the only sound audible in the room as rain poured silently outside.

"How was the delivery?" came a venomous reply from behind the counter.

Surprised, Cloud looked towards the owner of the voice's direction and noticed the woman's appearance: drenched; soaked from head to toe and an unmistakenably precarious glint in her eyes as she leaned on the counter, staring intently at his figure.

"It was ok…Had to drive a few miles out to give the guy his package. But it was worth it."

_Worth it huh? Would it be worth everything in this damn forsaken house?_

"Liar."

Eyes wide, Cloud fully turned to her.

"Liar. That's what you are. You could have just told me you were going to **her**." Tifa added a bit of emphasis to _her_; one that dealt with poison.

She didn't mean it, it just kind of happened.

"I…"

"Was it worth it Cloud? I sure as hell hope it was because I'm sick and tired of this. And I'm leaving!" She screamed, interrupting him before he could say anything else.

"Sick and tired? Sick and tired of what?! You're not the one living a life you don't want to be in! Pretending everyday...every single day and living without the one that made you feel…" and with that his voice stopped.

A single deep breath and he turned around towards the stairs.

Tifa could only gasp in shock. Cloud's sudden outburst stabbed her right in the heart and she had to slap a hand over her mouth from saying something she regretted.

"You know what. Forget this. We'll talk about this tomorrow morning. I think enough has been said. I think both of us has had a long day. Let's just discuss this tomorrow morning because I'm really not up for this right now. I'm tired and so are you…"

_You always run away from your problems. I'm sorry Cloud. But I really can't do this anymore. I'm not a little girl waiting for a _**stupid little promise**_ anymore. _

"_**Before I go**_…can I ask you just one question?"

"You already did." His voice tired but cold and apathetic as he continued to walk away, each step a stab in her heart as he ascended towards the stairs.

"Would you miss me just as much if I was gone?" She answered; barely a whisper with a coarse and broken voice.

Silence.

_Probably not. You'd be happy, smiling, laughing…if she was still here…_

_Would you have wished it was me in her place? _

_Would you have wished I took the plunge instead of her? _

_DID YOU?!!!_

So many questions and only one came dashing out through her lips.

But the simple gesture of his retreating back tore her heart into two and left to bleed out in the open as he ignored her question. She had finally taken the chance, finally gave him her heart wholeheartedly, only to be beaten down and torn.

Her tears rolled uncontrollably down her porcelain cheeks and yet no sound emitted from her rosy lips. Not a single sound.

But she didn't see the disappointed look plastered on his handsome face; or the clenching of his knuckles in the dark nor the frustrated look in his eyes.

Just the coldness of his rejection and the silent answer that hung in the air. And yet somehow the scene seemed somewhat oddly mundane.

When the silent noise of a door slamming slightly upstairs finally reached her ears, Tifa Lockheart slid down from the counter she was resting against and let a soft sob escape her.

_I'm sorry Cloud. But I just can't do this…_ Goodbye.

0---------------------------------------------------00---------------------------------------------------0

The loud cries of a little girl and the thrashing of a little boy from outside his room filled his ears and a certain alarm came into mind.

"Marlene! Denzel!"

The 23-year old blonde came dashing out his room and into the hallway following the sound of two crying children sitting down in front of Tifa's room.

"What is it? What's wrong? You're not hurt, are you?"

"Cloud! _Tifa left_!" Sniff Sniff

"What?! I'm sure she's not gone. Probably just out shopping for groceries or something,"

Sniff Sniff Wail.

"Then why would she take all her stuff?" cried Marlene loudly as she pointed to Tifa's bare room; no clothes in the open closet door, or colorful sheets on the bed, and no family picture on the nightstand next to her bed.

Cloud's eyes scanned the room and the realization dawned on him.

"What?!"

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_A/N: END._ I TRIED. Don't hit me. -.-

**Give into temptation. HIT THAT REVIEW BUTTON.** please?


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: FF7 does not belong to me. But I wish it did.

Author's Notes: Oh my how long it's been. _SORRY! _But here's the second chapter! 

Warning: Maybe a bit OOC but you will see why in the end. 

Read, enjoy and review!

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_3 months. 4 weeks. 17 days. 6 hours. 28 minutes. _And_ 47 seconds…_

He finally found her.

_And I'm not letting go._

On the shores of Kalm; she sat tranquilly, knees up close to her chest, soft arms encircled around them with her hair elegantly swaying in the slight breeze behind her.

The sunset reflecting a subtle glow to her now tanned skin.

She looked like a fallen angel. …But an angel nonetheless.

_Clunk Clunk_. His heavy footsteps began as he trudged eagerly towards her.

"Tifa."

It came out choked. Nervousness dripping from his voice, afraid she'll slip away the moment he said her name.

"Tifa," he called again; hesitantly.

Still no reply.

The silence itching him like it had for the past 3 months in the empty bar. No Tifa. No children –alone. Barrett had taken Denzel and Marlene away from him. They were gone. _She_ was gone; and his heart along with her.

One more step–closer to the woman he loved–and a skipped heartbeat.

_Almost there Cloud. You finally found her. Just take her home._

"Don't!" A sharp tone eminent from her first reply to him in 3 months interrupted his thoughts. She sat still in front of him calmly but the muscles in her arms visibly tightened around her knees as he took each step.

"Tif—"

"Please don't," she whispered with a tired voice this time, "Please just go away…Go away Cloud! …Please."

His heart dropped at her defeated voice. There's no way this was _his_ Tifa.

_She'll come back to me…right?_

"I—"

"Please don't. Whatever you have to say, I don't want to hear it," interrupted Tifa. Her voice tired but stable. "Just go away."

_No. I'm not leaving without you!_

"Just hear me ou—"

"No!" Tifa cut in once again. Voice rising. Angered with Cloud's sudden appearance, she shot up from her spot and dusted off her cream-colored sun dress.

_Who the hell did he think he was? He can't just come back and barge into my life again!_

"Tif—"

"Cloud! I'm serious! LEAVE!"

_Leave without you? I CAN'T even LIVE WITHOUT YOU!_

"Will you just—"

"No! I'm done! I left for a reason! You made it clear that you didn't want me in your life. You made it clear that I wasn't worth a single ounce of your time! You—"

"TIFA!" Yelled Cloud.

Surprised by his abrupt outburst, Tifa stopped and gasped.

"Will you please just let me talk? Just hear me out for 5 minutes ok?" His voice taking a soft and pleading tone; a surprise that came to both him and Tifa.

Taken aback by his unexpected actions, Tifa nodded and stood still; her right arm clutching her left, eyes uncertain but fixated on the blonde hero before her.

"Ok…" she whispered.

"Thank you," Cloud said. Uncertain of how to start he scratched the back of his head and sighed.

"Look I know I haven't been the best person. …It's hard for me to show any emotions. I…I'm not very good at this stuff. After Aries died (Tifa turned away at her name) I've just been confused. I'm not sure what to do. I'm trying really hard and I know it might not seem like it but… but I am."

Pause.

"Tifa I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything I've done to hurt you. I know what I said last time was wrong. I didn't mean any of it. I…I want you back Tifa. I do. I don't want you out of my life. I want you to come back home and know that you're there waiting for me. You were always there for me Tifa. …And I want to be there for you. I know you don't trust me but…but I'll do whatever it takes. I will. _I promise_…"

He sighed, taking another step closer. He outstretched his right arm towards her and asked, "Tifa will you forgive me?"

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She stepped back the moment he had gone closer and shook her head in reply.

She refused to look at him, afraid the tears might fall. So instead she bowed her head and silently answered in a wavering voice.

"No. Please don't. Don't ask me that. Don't. I don't…I don't want your promises…_they never last_. I don't want your lies…_they just keep piling up_. I don't want your apology…_it's only a front_. I…I don't want you…_back in my life_. No… No. Not anymore."

Stunned at her answer, Cloud dropped his hand back to his side. Heart shattered to pieces, he fell silent, eyes blank from Tifa's rejection.

_I can't go on without you. I love you Tifa Lockheart. I'm going to do whatever it takes._

"I'm scared to let you go. To leave, knowing that I'll come back alone; empty handed. I came for you. I searched for you. I want you back Tifa. I want _my _Tifa back." He finally said letting all emotions out, barriers down and confessions on the table.

Sigh.

"I was never _your _Tifa."

"I'm not leaving without you."

"..and you can never let someone go, if you never had them in the first place, Cloud."

"If you're not coming, then I'm staying."

"..you know just because you searched for someone doesn't mean that it will all be better."

"I'm going to make it all better Tifa. I will."

"I appreciate the offer. But I think I'm settled without you in my life."

"Well I'm not settled! Why don't you get it Tifa? I WANT YOU BACK! I WANT YOU IN MY LIFE!" Cloud yelled, frustration getting the best of him from Tifa's lack of cooperation.

"Just because someone says they want a person back in their life, doesn't mean that the other person wants to be back in theirs," Tifa countered flawlessly.

"But I know YOU do. You stayed by my side…you always did. And, and you're talking to me now. So that means you still want to. Because you're still here…"

_Right?_

As Cloud looked at her with pleading eyes, she raised her head and smiled blankly towards him. With a slight shake of her head, she turned the other way and began walking away from him.

"If my staying shows you that, then I'll gladly correct that assumption."

_She's leaving!_

But before Tifa could take another step, Cloud found himself asking, "But what _if _I said I love you?"

"Yeah…_IF_…" Pause. Then Tifa whispered to herself, "What if? It's only hypothetical. And that's all it will ever be."

_No. No. No. It's real. It's true! I LOVE YOU TIFA!_

Panic filled Cloud, and before he knew what he was doing he unconsciously found himself confessing, "I love you."

A barely audible whisper from the blonde but a certain 8-letter, 3 words confession that reached the brunette's ears causing her feet to halt in their steps.

"Yes. I love you Tifa Lockheart. So much I don't know what to do. I've loved you since the first day I met you. I joined SOLDIER to impress you. I promised to save you whenever you needed me because I wanted to be _your_ knight in shining armor. _Me_. I've always loved you. I just…I knew I wasn't good enough for you."

Pause.

"Damnit Tifa! I LOVE YOU!"

And with that Cloud Strife strode after Tifa Lockheart and spun her around, crushing her petite body against his toned muscular one. He grabbed her cheeks and lowered his head down to her level.

"I love you. Only you and I want you back in my life. So please. Please give me one more chance."

Tifa dumbfounded by the whirl of events, opened her mouth to reply when Cloud took the opportunity and kissed her lips.

_God how long I've been waiting for this. _

Abandoning all sense of rationality, Tifa let go of her inhibitions and wrapped her arms around Cloud's neck and pulled him closer as he moved his hands down towards her lower back.

"I love you too."

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The warmth of the sun's rays filling the cool room stirred the ex-SOLDIER away from his peaceful slumber. The events of last night filled his memory, and a genuine smile crept its way to his handsome features.

"Mmmm…I love you Tifa," He began the morning groggily rolling over to the side to hug the brunette sleeping beauty.

To his surprise, however, the spot next to him lay empty and spacious. Worry rising within him, the tall blonde got up from the bed and called out the other woman's name.

Concerned that there was no answer, he got up alert afraid something had happened and headed towards her room.

"Tifa?" He called out once again. "Are you in here? Tifa."

He knocked on her door, wondering if she was getting dressed. Receiving no reply, he slowly opened her door.

Empty.

Nothing.

No Tifa. No clothes. No sheets. No Family Picture.

No Tifa.

_WHAT THE HELL?!_

A **deceitful dream**__that left him feeling empty and shattered…

Even some things that seem so real are indeed just a figment of our imagination.

_Is this how you felt every time I left?_

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_A/N: END._ I TRIED. Don't hit me. -.-

**Give into temptation. HIT THAT REVIEW BUTTON.** please?


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